My youngest son, Samuel, recently turned 4 years old. He was diagnosed with autism right before his third birthday. Although not completely taken by surprise by this diagnosis, my husband and I still grieved as we wondered why this was happening and what lay ahead for Samuel.

Now, a year later, I still have my frustrating moments, as any mother does, but I have also found that Samuel has helped me appreciate many things that I had taken for granted. I had never imagined that I would celebrate such seemingly insignificant bits of progress. These celebrations may seem uncalled for to an outsider, but I find joy in each of them. During his last haircut–his least favorite activity (brushing his teeth being a close second)–I expected to hear the usual string of unrelated words from Samuel as he expressed his unhappiness. Instead, he yelled repeatedly, “I don’t like it!” I never thought such an unpleasant experience could bring me so much joy. I remember thinking to myself as I struggled to hold him steady, “Wow! He said, ‘I don’t like it!’ That’s great!”

As Samuel grows, we learn more about him and what makes him who he is. Over time I have gained an appreciation of the little things that Samuel takes such delight in: school buses, the color brown, the shapes of windows on garage doors, #81 on the garbage truck, pancakes and scrambled eggs for breakfast (again), his rain boots, photo albums, numbers, the sky ride at the zoo, stop signs, and chocolate (which I am happy to appreciate with him.)

I am filled with hope for Samuel each time a milestone is met, but I also find much to smile about in a typical day. Ever since Samuel was quite young, we have called him our little comedian. Although the feelings he can express are limited, his comedic sense has helped to create a bond between him and the rest of our family. I have often said that he has some great jokes that he just can’t wait to tell us someday. Besides making us laugh, he comes up with some creative activities to keep us smiling, whether we should or not. His passion for throwing underwear on the chandelier has generated some restrained chuckles, although we also learned that, yes, underwear burns. We try to forget about the pair that was left on a hot light bulb a little too long. At least Samuel’s 6-year-old brother is a great smoke alarm.

I never imagined how much I could love a boy who is so much of a mystery to me. I have such a desire to get to know him better and to understand how he sees the world around him. I see every day as an opportunity to teach him more, and I am amazed at how much he is teaching me. I still hope and pray that one day we can sit down and share our thoughts and feelings with each other. For now, I’m just thankful for the little boy who gives me hugs and brings joy to my life.